In India, the day we are born our parents start planning our wedding. Yup it's true, the pressure might be low, but the hope is always there that my child will get married. While growing up the reference keeps on happening, we will get you married here, your husband/wife should be like, this social conditioning makes marriage a normality for any one growing up in India. No wonder there are roughly 10 million marriages every year.
Also 759 million of us are active on the Internet, well no wonder the online matrimonial market is a booming $0.26 billion dollars annually with Shaadi.com, BharatMatrimony.com, Matrimonial.com, CommunityMatrimony.com, Sangam, BetterHalf, M4Marry, Intimate Matrimony, Joddi, Nest Matrimony, Love Vivah, Hans Matrimony being some of the popular ones.
There are people, there is money, there are platforms BOOM! perfect combination for criminals. In this particular Gangs of Cyberpur. We have Keyboards, Internet connections, Laptops, Mobiles, Photoshop, Artificial intelligence, the only one missing is Anurag Kashyap.
Instead what we have is loads of broken hearts, many empty bank accounts, people getting blackmailed for intimate images and videos, cyber crime cells trying their best and failing.
Let's rewind and walk you through the story, you just landed your first job (for a boy) & you just finished your studies (for a girl). {I apologise for this patriarchal setup but that's India of 2024}. Your parents + #LogKyaKahege squad makes your profile on one of the popular matrimonial websites, it's usually the one owned by Anupam Mittal (the man knows how to build a brand).
Reader Disclaimer: This story highlights the red flags, and the steps to be taken to ensure you do not get duped. So please ensure others know about the steps.
Profile created, you found exactly who you imagined! He/She is perfect, just like Bolly/Holly/Tolly or some other wood has programmed it in your head. You start chatting, and the 1st red flag goes up! Any guesses?
The cyber criminal moves you to Whatsapp/Signal/Telegram/Facebook/Instagram, and the chat continues. If this has happened and you have their mobile number, call them, do a video chat with your clothes on, talk generally about where they are, how is the weather, how is their job, any other news which has happened today.
Because most cyber criminals use scripts which have been created over decades of Data, they are usually not up to date on breaking news, (so events of today, political, social, entertainment, sports) they become easy markers to understand if the person is real or catfishing.
Real people will engage on the topic, have an opinion, fake ones will change the topic to something more generic by saying "Oh I never read the news" , "tell me your favourite colour", "what you like to eat, drink".
Secondly a good test is to talk about their Job, now two things will happen which are great indicators. One they will say "I don't like to talk about my job", or they will have a super special James Bond meets Ethan Hunt in a secret space station kind of a job which sounds too good to be true. Because it's NOT!
Hopefully this step of a phone/ clothed video call with the specifics, helps you weed out the criminals. But let's just say they were smart enough or good looking/rich appearing/barely clothed/naked enough to fool you. This next step is foolproof.
They will ask for money. Their family member will be unwell, or they will have an accident, or need a Gift Card/Crypto/Pay for their credit card, book a flight to meet you. Oh I have heard it all. Please keep your wallet away. DO NOT GIVE THEM MONEY IN ANY FORM, That is their aim, the second they know, no money is coming from you. That’s it they move on to the other 1000 people they are duping.
Let's say we were not able to reach you in time ! And things have gone wrong. What are the steps you can take?
- Report to the website, websites have their own reporting portals where you can report: Shaadi.com, BharatMatrimony.com, JeevanSathi.com (this will lead to some investigation on behalf of the platform, they will probably remove the fake profile, but I doubt much benefit will come to you).
- Report to the cyber crime portal or the cyber cell (having an FIR, makes your case stronger for sure, but requires time and proper legal counselling)
Be Safe, find the partner you are looking for.